Question by Rico Toasterman JPA: What is your favorite dog joke?
Here are two of mine:

The other day, I’m sitting in the movie theater, when this guy and his dog walk in and sit in front of me, just as the movie starts. I was about to go get the usher and complain when I notice the dog is totally paying attention to the screen. It wags its tail at the funny parts, it puts its head in its paws during the scary parts, it droops its ears and whines softly at the sad parts. When the movie was over, I said to the guy, “I’m amazed, your dog seemed to truly enjoy the picture.”

The guy said, “I’m amazed, too, he hated the book.”

Then, I’m in the supermarket, at the butcher counter, when a dogs walks up. I figure the guy behind the counter is going to go ballistic, but instead, he asks the dog, “What’ll it be today?” The dog puts his paw on the glass in front of the lamb chops, and barks four times. So the guy starts to pull out four chops. He wraps them up and gives them to the dog, who gently takes the package in his mouth, and wags his tail, then turns to leave. I say, “You always give away free meat to hungry dogs?” And he says, “Oh, it’s not free. He’s going to pay.” Well, this I got to see. So I follow the dog to the check out counter. He gets up on his hind paws and drops the package on the conveyor belt. The cashier rings it up. The dog opens a little fanny pack thing around its neck using just its mouth, and pulls out a credit card. The clerk scans it through, and then puts an ink pad and the credit slip on the floor in front of the dog, who inks up his right paw and makes its mark on the credit slip. The cashier hand the package to the dog, who happily trots out the door. I gotta see this through to the end, so I follow the dog. It goes about two blocks away to a little house, goes up to the front door, scratches on the door, and whines and barks to be let in. A guy opens the door and immediately starts yelling at the dog. I have to intervene. “How can you yell at this animal,” I say, “it has to be the smartest dog in the world.”

“Yeah? If he’s so smart, why is this the third time this week he’s forgotten his keys?”

Best answer:

Answer by khahrosh
Both of those are fairly funny, Rico. A bit long for my personal liking, but not bad.
My very favorite dog joke, though, is a very concise one.

Adolf Hitler is making a speech to a crowd. He tells everyone: “My dog has no nose!”
The crowd yells out: “How does it smell?”
Hitler shouts back his answer: “Awful!”

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